Are you doing Kegel exercises correctly? You may have ignored these problems?

If you’ve been told to “just do Kegels” for issues like light bladder leakage, postpartum recovery, or pelvic organ prolapse, you’re not alone. Kegel exercises, named after Dr. Arnold Kegel, are the go-to recommendation for strengthening the pelvic floor. They are hailed as a simple, discreet, and drug-free solution.

But here’s the uncomfortable truth that many are reluctant to discuss: a staggering number of people are doing them incorrectly. In fact, some studies suggest that up to 50% of individuals cannot perform a proper Kegel contraction with verbal instruction alone.

Doing Kegels wrong isn't just a waste of time; it can be counterproductive, potentially worsening the very problems you're trying to fix. So, before you spend another minute squeezing and hoping for the best, let’s dive into the common, often ignored problems that could be sabotaging your progress.

First, a Quick Refresher: What Are the Pelvic Floor Muscles?

Imagine a supportive hammock or a sling of muscles stretching from your pubic bone at the front to your tailbone at the back. This is your pelvic floor. It has three crucial jobs:

1. Support: It holds up your bladder, uterus (in women), prostate (in men), and rectum.

2. Sphincteric: It helps control the release of urine, feces, and gas.

3. Sexual: It contributes to sexual sensation and function.

When this "hammock" becomes weak or damaged—from childbirth, surgery, chronic constipation, obesity, or simply aging—it can lead to a host of problems, collectively known as Pelvic Floor Dysfunction.

The 5 Most Common Kegel Mistakes You're Probably Making

Problem 1: You're Squeezing the Wrong Muscles (The Most Common Error)

This is the cornerstone of failed Kegel attempts. Many people, when told to "squeeze," inadvertently engage their glutes (buttocks), inner thighs, or abdominal muscles.

How to Know if You're Doing This:

• The Mirror Test: Lie down in a private space with a hand mirror. Look at your vaginal opening (for women) or perineum (the area between scrotum and anus for men). As you attempt to contract, you should see a subtle "lifting" and "tightening" sensation around the opening, not a "bearing down" or pushing out. The anus should also pucker inward slightly.

• The Finger Test: For women, after washing your hands, insert a finger into your vagina. Try to squeeze around your finger. You should feel a gentle tightening and lifting sensation around the entire circumference of your finger, not just a push against it.

Why It's a Problem: Clenching your glutes or abs does nothing to strengthen your pelvic floor. You’re just getting good at tensing the wrong muscle groups, which can lead to muscle fatigue elsewhere without addressing the core issue.

Problem 2: You're "Pushing" Instead of "Lifting and Pulling In"

This is a subtle but critical distinction. A correct Kegel is an upward and inward motion. An incorrect one often involves a downward bearing or pushing force, which is the exact opposite of what you want.

How to Know if You're Doing This:

• Place a hand lightly on your lower abdomen. It should remain soft during the contraction. If you feel your abdomen bulge outward or push down, you are likely using a Valsalva maneuver (bearing down) instead of an isolated pelvic floor lift.

• Pay attention to your breath. You should be able to breathe normally throughout the entire exercise. If you find yourself holding your breath to achieve the squeeze, it's a sign you're straining and likely pushing.

Why It's a Problem: Bearing down repeatedly puts excessive pressure on the pelvic floor, stretching and weakening it further. This can exacerbate symptoms of pelvic organ prolapse and stress urinary incontinence.

Problem 3: You're Not Achieving a Full Contraction and Relaxation Cycle

Kegels are not just about the squeeze; they are equally about the release. The relaxation phase is when the muscle truly recovers and gains endurance. Many people focus solely on the contraction and neglect to fully let go.

How to Know if You're Doing This:

• After you release the contraction, consciously check if you feel a sense of "dropping" or "lengthening." The relaxation should be as deliberate as the contraction.

• If you feel a persistent, low-level tension in the area even after you think you've relaxed, you may be suffering from a hypertonic (overly tight) pelvic floor.

Why It's a Problem: Incomplete relaxation can lead to muscle fatigue and hypertonicity. An overly tight pelvic floor can be just as problematic as a weak one, causing pain with intercourse, urinary urgency, and difficulty fully emptying the bladder.

Problem 4: You're Inconsistent or Impatient

"Doing Kegels for a week and seeing no results" is a common complaint. The pelvic floor muscles are like any other skeletal muscle; they require consistent, long-term training to see significant change.

How to Know if You're Doing This:

• Are you doing them only a few times a week, or forgetting for days at a time?

• Are you expecting to see a change in bladder control after just a few sessions?

Why It's a Problem: Building strength and neuromuscular coordination takes time. It typically takes 8 to 12 weeks of consistent, daily practice to notice a significant improvement in symptoms. Sporadic effort yields sporadic, if any, results.

Problem #5: You're Doing Them at the Wrong Time or in the Wrong Position

Starting your Kegel journey while sitting in a car or standing in line is a recipe for failure. When you're new to this, you need to eliminate gravity and distractions to ensure proper form.

How to Know if You're Doing This:

• You try to do them while also contracting other muscles to maintain your posture in a chair or while walking.

Why It's a Problem: It’s too difficult to isolate the correct muscles when you're also engaging a host of other stabilizers. Mastering the technique in a supported, reclined position is the essential first step.

The Correct Technique: Your Step-by-Step Guide to Proper Kegels

Ready to reset and start over? Follow these steps to ensure you're building a strong pelvic floor correctly.

1. Find the Right Muscles (The "Stopping the Flow" Test): The next time you urinate, try to slow or stop the stream of urine mid-flow. The muscles you use to do this are your pelvic floor muscles. Important: This is only a identification tool. Do not regularly perform Kegels while urinating, as it can disrupt the bladder's natural emptying reflex.

2. Get into Position: Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Place a small pillow under your hips for support if desired. This position minimizes the influence of other muscle groups.

3. The Contraction:

   • Take a normal breath in, and as you breathe out, gently draw your pelvic floor muscles up and in. Imagine you are trying to lift a small marble with your vagina, or trying to stop yourself from passing gas.

   • Focus on a "squeeze and lift" sensation. Your buttocks, thighs, and abdomen should remain relaxed.

   • Hold the contraction for 3-5 seconds, while continuing to breathe normally.

4. The Relaxation:

   • Release the contraction completely and fully. Feel the muscles "drop" and lengthen.

   • Rest for at least 3-5 seconds (or longer) before the next contraction. This rest period is non-negotiable.

5. Repeat and Progress:

   • Aim for 10 repetitions, 1 to 3 times per day.

   • As you get stronger, gradually increase the hold time to 10 seconds, while maintaining a rest period that is at least as long as the hold.

When to Seek Professional Help: It's Not a Sign of Failure

If you've read this far and are still unsure, or if you're experiencing pain, it is absolutely time to see a professional. A pelvic health physical therapist is a specialist who can:

• Perform an Internal Exam: This is the gold standard for assessing your pelvic floor muscle function, tone, and coordination.

• Provide Biofeedback: Using sensors, they can show you a real-time display of your muscle activity, taking all the guesswork out of the process.

• Diagnose Hypertonic Pelvic Floor: If your muscles are too tight, they can teach you relaxation techniques, as strengthening exercises would be counterproductive.

• Create a Personalized Plan: They will tailor a program specifically for your body's needs.

Conclusion: Precision Over Power

Doing Kegel exercises correctly is less about brute force and more about precision and mindfulness. Ignoring the subtle nuances of the contraction and relaxation cycle is why so many people struggle without results.

Take a step back. Re-evaluate your technique. Be patient and consistent. And if you hit a wall, don't hesitate to seek guidance. Your pelvic floor is a core pillar of your health—it deserves the same careful attention you'd give to any other important part of your body.